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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30124008">One Night in Manhattan</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/transzsasz/pseuds/sonny'>sonny (transzsasz)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Law &amp; Order: SVU</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Jealous Sonny, Jealousy, Kennedy Center Chess (2018), Love Confessions, M/M, Mild Smut, Nonbinary Character, Rafael isn't ada, because i am so weak for Kings, freddie/anatoly mentioned, he/they sonny as always, this is an svu/chess cross over of sorts</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-16 02:14:11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,039</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30124008</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/transzsasz/pseuds/sonny</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Sonny felt stupid, they hadn't even kissed, people who like each other kissed and Rafael never made a move on him which obviously meant this whole thing was just stupid and one-sided. But still, Sonny missed him.</p><p>That's how he ended up with a ticket to see Chess. </p><p> </p><p>---</p><p>Barba leaves as ADA and instead joins the theatre, starring as Freddie Trumper in Chess. Sonny misses him.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Rafael Barba/Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr.</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>51</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>One Night in Manhattan</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/drqco/gifts">drqco</a>, <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/cityofflights/gifts">cityofflights</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>this is totally self indulgent but this is also for rion and mari and i hope they like it, this is for you besties</p><p>everything in chess is like, exactly the same only Raul is Rafael</p><p>also i've wrote it in my tags but!!! sonny is nonbinary!! he/they pronouns are used for them</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Rafael leaving his position as ADA was upsetting, Sonny hated having someone else working with them, he hated walking by his office and knowing he wasn't there anymore. It came out of the blue, or maybe it didn't and he just hadn't told Sonny about it which just upset him even more; he really thought that maybe they were going somewhere with their stolen glances. Sonny felt stupid, they hadn't even kissed, people who like each other kissed and Rafael never made a move on him which obviously meant this whole thing was just stupid and one-sided. But still, Sonny missed him.</p><p>That's how he ended up with a ticket to see Chess. </p><p>Sonny hadn't been to see a musical in years, he brought it up with Rafael a few times, Rafe had mentioned that'd he'd happily go with him but they never got around to it. Plus, Sonny wasn't sure whether he was saying he'd go with him to humour him or if he really did like musical theatre, but now it was obvious because Rafael Barba had the lead role in this musical about a politically driven, Cold War–era chess tournament between two grandmasters, one American and the other Soviet Russian and a love story of sorts. Sonny didn't know what to expect, he didn't really do much research other than to check that it really was <em>his</em> Rafael playing Freddie Trumper. As soon as he found his answer, he bought a ticket.</p><p>It was surreal, Sonny knew that Rafe had a flair for the dramatics, he'd always carried himself with that edge and Sonny remembered thinking to themselves once or twice that if Rafael wasn't ADA he should be a performer of sorts because of that theatrical air that followed him around. He was mesmerising, even his turn in court, his closing arguments, felt like a show, one that Sonny could never take his eyes off. They always thought that they went to Rafael's closing arguments to learn from them, but now they realise it was more likely because it felt like an episode of The Rafael Barba Show and Sonny never liked to miss an episode.</p><p>It was a cold evening but thankfully he wasn't waiting outside for long, he had wanted to get there early to try and see Rafael before the show but work had dragged, then the traffic to get here from his apartment had been hell, they just hoped that they'd be able to see him afterwards. Sonny had his number, he could have called but he didn't really know what to say; <em>'Hey Barba, you sorta left without saying goodbye and I'm really hurt by that because I think I have a crush on you and now I'm sad you're gone',</em> Sonny shuddered, that just sounded desperate. He was, desperate that is, but he didn't want Rafael to know that, that was just embarrassing.</p><p>
  <em>Yeah, because turning up at a show, completely uninvited and unannounced just to see a guy who didn't even say he was leaving was much better?</em>
</p><p>Sonny tried to empty his mind, tried to focus on finding his seat, he didn't even know what seat they'd booked, they just clicked purchase as soon as he realised tickets were on sale. Turns out he'd book front row and now Sonny wanted to curl up and die, what if Rafe notices him? Would he be pissed that he just turned up? Sonny doubted that they'd be able  to play it off as he picked a random show and this was just a coincidence. Fuck, this was going to be a mess, maybe he should just leave, this was a bad idea and...</p><p>"Are you going to sit?" Sonny turned, giving the woman who spoke a sheepish smile.</p><p>"Yeah, sorry I..." Sonny didn't know what to say, he sighed and sat in his seat, the woman and, he guessed, her friend walked by him, she sat in the seat next to him, her friend sitting in the seat beside her.</p><p>"Are you okay?" She asked, her tone soft and Sonny thought it was nice she was checking on him but really wished she leave them alone.</p><p>"Yeah, I didn't realise I book a seat so close to the stage," He admitted, "I... I know the guy who is playing Freddie."</p><p>"Oh?" Her eyes seemed to light up, "He is fantastic, I came to last nights showing with my sister."</p><p>"So... he's good?" Sonny sat up, eye curious.</p><p>"Brilliant, just wait until you hear him sing, and the way he moves?" The woman laughed, "He is truly something, how long have you known him?"</p><p>"Like, four years?"</p><p>"And you... you've never heard him sing? Or even knew he could sing?"</p><p>"I never asked, I know him through work and it's not really a... singing and dancing sorta environment," Sonny paused, "Although... I do remember hearing him do drunk karaoke a few times and I was blown away then."</p><p>"Just you wait," The woman said, "You'll be even more blown away hearing him sing when sober." Sonny just smiled at her, turning his attention to the stage, he didn't know how to feel now but as the lights went down he realised that he just had to figure out his feelings as he went because he wasn't leaving now.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
Love. It was love he was feeling and he realised that the /moment/ Rafael came out wearing a fucking leather jacket with a fucking beard, everything seemed to hit him in the face as Rafe just put everything into his singing, his performance reminding him so much of how he was in court; passionate, powerful, <em>sexy</em>. Sonny couldn't tear his eyes away, found himself feeling sad when he wasn't on stage, his performance made him worried when Freddie was shown having a paranoid breakdown, Sonny had to keep reminding himself that the guy on stage wasn't Barba, just his character but he couldn't help it. The woman who sat beside him was right, he was completely blown away, drunk karaoke be damned, those nights were nothing compared to how Rafe performed now, like the stage is where he felt the most comfortable.</p><p>Sonny felt like he was holding himself together pretty well, considering he just realised he's madly in love with the former ADA, he felt relatively calm and he was convinced that he'd be able to get through the rest of this show and then even run home and have a crisis about whether he confessed to Barba or not, or whether he waited after the show and just hoped he managed to bump into Rafael. He didn't know which would be a better idea, maybe going straight back to his apartment would work, save himself from the embarrassing conversation that would probably follow because Sonny couldn't hold his tongue around Rafe. </p><p>Anyway, Rafael hadn't even noticed him, sitting in the front row was working wonders because Rafe would look right over them, his attention not even in the crowd just in his performance, it was almost overwhelming to watch but that made it easier for Sonny, it meant he could sneak out with Rafael ever knowing he was there. It was a perfect plan.</p><p> </p><p>Their perfect plan crumbled around them during the second act, when Sonny realised that Rafael knew <em>exactly</em> where he was, coming out on stage in that damned leather jacket, women and men in just their underwear dancing around him as they sang One Night in Bangkok. The performance was enough to make Sonny feel dizzy, watching Rafe grind against girls and get groped by guys, but he genuinely thought he was going to pass out when Rafe caught his eyes, holding eye contact and smirking as he thrust his hips into the air, so close to Sonny's face yet still so far away.</p><p>Sonny could feel the blood rush to places he really didn't want it too, his face was on fire and he was shifting in his seat, close to climbing onto the stage and jumping Rafael himself. Then Rafe lifted his arms, his shirt rose just a bit, a flash of flesh showing, it was a split second but it was enough to drive Sonny mad, that little strip of Rafe's tummy on display made his mouth dry and he realised he was breathing quite harshly, gripping the arms of his seat tightly to try and keep himself grounded because <em>holy fuck,</em> Rafael knew exactly what he was doing. Sonny wasn't even grasping at straws here, Rafe was purposely making eye contact with Sonny, every thrust and sexual motion always being aimed towards them.</p><p>"Are you okay?" The woman whispered, leaning close to his ear, making Sonny jump but not enough to take his eyes off Rafe who had a humours glint in his eye, meaning he saw that.</p><p>"I'm fine." Sonny whispered back, the woman looked from Sonny to Rafe to Sonny again and smirked herself.</p><p>"I see." She settled back in her seat before Sonny could even question what she was meaning, then again he didn't care, he just cared about Rafe as Freddie right now, feeling his stomach drop when the performance was over.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
The show was fantastic, they were all so talented and Sonny found that he was really enjoying himself, even if Rafe hadn't been part of this musical he'd probably still have liked it, Rafael was just an added bonus. Sonny couldn't stop himself from crying when Rafe came out with Pity the Child, his voice carrying in his mind long after the song had finished, he couldn't get it out of his mind, the way he looked close to crying himself; Sonny couldn't help but wonder if it made Rafael think of his own childhood, it broke his heart.</p><p>One thing Sonny realised was that he found himself so jealous of every interaction that Freddie and Anatoly had together. Sonny tried to remind himself that these two on stage are just playing characters, but Rafael really said <em>'Oh, Anatoly, we've sacrificed everything and they've sacrificed nothing'</em> with his whole heart and the way he looked Ramin Karimloo in the eyes, everything being so tender, made it really difficult for Sonny to see Freddie and Anatoly and not Rafael and Ramin. It made him feel worried but then again, Sonny guessed it just made them both talented by making him feel so much emotion through this moments on stage.</p><p>Sonny's mind really was all over the place, his brain still focused on the way Rafe teased him during One Night in Bankok, his heart still hurt over Pity the Child and anxiety spiked thinking about <em>'On, Anatoly'</em>, like, what if Rafe had moved on? But that was stupid, he wouldn't have put on a such a show for Sonny while he preformed, probably, the most sexual act Sonny had ever seen on stage. His fears felt squished a little more when they all came out on stage for the last time to bask in the applause that the whole cast truly deserved, Rafael was smiling brighter than Sonny had ever seen but he was scanning the front row, his eyes landing on Sonny, his smile widened further and it put them at ease. Rafael was looking for him, it had to be a good sign.</p><p> </p><p>Once the show was over and the cast had left to go backstage, Sonny wondered what the hell he should do now, how does he even get to Rafael now? He couldn't just walk over and say 'Hey, yeah, I'm best friends with Barba and I'm here to say hey and to probably kiss him', because that would get him thrown out. Sonny sighed, the woman next to him noticed; "You going to the stage door?"</p><p>"The what?" Sonny asked, following her as she stood up.</p><p>"You really don't come to musicals often do you?"</p><p>"No, I was supposed to go with Rafe but... work and stuff," Sonny shook his head, walking close to her side, her friend on her right, "What's stage door?"</p><p>"People hang around it after a show, it's outside, they wait and sometimes the cast comes out to greet us," She said, "They did it yesterday, I was wondering if you'd be going, maybe your friend will come out."</p><p>"Oh..." Sonny thought for a second, that cleared up what to do next, "Can you show me where?"</p><p>"Of course, that's where we're going now," She said, "How did you say you knew Rafael?"</p><p>"Through work," Sonny said, "He's... he's probably my best friend." She smiled.</p><p>"That's so sweet, it's nice for you to come and support him."</p><p>"Yeah, well... we haven't seen each other in a few weeks and I miss him."</p><p>"I'm guessing that's why you look so nervous right now," Sonny shrugged, "Hey, it's okay, I saw the way he looked at you."</p><p>"Huh?" Sonny glanced at her, confused.</p><p>"Like there wasn't anyone else in the crowd but you." Sonny blushed, unsure what to say to that as they left the building and walked around the side to the stage door.</p><p> </p><p>There were a few people stood outside, waiting, actually it was more than a few and Sonny was convinced that he'd miss his chance with Rafael. He'd lost the woman he was sitting beside but Sonny wasn't too bothered, she was with her friend and he didn't need her hanging around when, or if, they managed to get the attention of Rafe. His phone vibrated in his pocket, he pulled it out and his heart started beating too fast and he was convinced he was going to pass out <em>this</em> time when he saw it was a text from Rafe; <em>'Come to the stage door, please.'</em></p><p>Sonny messaged him back, letting him know that he was already there. The doors opened a few seconds later, Karen Olivo and Ruthie Ann Miles coming out first, closely followed by Ramin and Rafael who was smiling at his phone before quickly pocketing it and turning that smile to the screaming crowd in front of them; his eyes weren't focused on them though, they were just scanning through until they landed on Sonny and Sonny felt safe again.</p><p>Rafael seemed to be born for this, he seemed almost like a completely different person from the ADA he knew but it was still him, still his Rafael, he was just... happier. Sonny stood to the side, watching the crowd thin out as they got their autographs and their photos until Olivo and Miles had gone back inside and it was just Sonny, Rafael and Ramin and Sonny didn't know what to do, he just awkwardly stood there until Rafael whispered something to Ramin who laughed, nodded his head and turned away; going back inside the theatre.</p><p>"Uh... hey..." Sonny wanted to cringe at how awkward he sounded, "So... you were really good."</p><p>"Thank you," Rafael said, his smile never leaving his face, "I'm glad you came, it would have been cheaper to just call though." Sonny shrugged.</p><p>"I enjoyed the show."</p><p>"Which part?" Sonny flushed, unsure how to answer that, "Wanna come back stage? I was just getting my stuff together... maybe we could go for a drink."</p><p>"Together?"</p><p>"That's what the 'we' meant in that sentence." Sonny laughed, Rafael hadn't changed at all.</p><p>"I'd like that," Sonny walked closer, up the steps until he was in front of Rafael, "I'd like that a lot." Sonny loved the way Rafael licked his lips and nodded. </p><p>They stood there, almost touching but not quite, for a while until Rafael broke the trance, gesturing to the door and holding it open for Sonny. Sonny walked in, Rafael behind him but he quickly made his way to Sonny's side. They were silent, but it wasn't uncomfortable, it was nice, like nothing had ever changed, like they were walking down the halls to the way to court or the precinct or whatever. Sonny realised he didn't give a shit where he was walking, as long as it was with Rafael.</p><p>"I meant it, by the way, when I said you were really good," Sonny said, "Could have cried during Pity a Child."</p><p>"I think I recall you did actually cry." Rafael smirked at him.</p><p>"Caught that, huh?"</p><p>"I catch everything you do, Sonny," He said, "I really am happy you came."</p><p>"I was curious and... and I missed you." Sonny could feel his palms beginning to sweat with the nerves of his confession.</p><p>"I've missed you too." Rafael spoke softly, taking Sonny's hand in his own as they walked down the corridor, towards the dressing rooms, they passed Olivo and Miles first and Rafael said good night to them, they smiled and wished him a good evening too.</p><p>"They seem nice."</p><p>"They're lovely, and so talented," Rafael said, "Karen is so easy to work with, her words almost feel believable to me when she sings."</p><p>"I get that, I..." Sonny stopped talking when Ramin walked out of a room, the door said<em> 'Kaimloo and Barba Dressing Room'</em> and the jealousy that he felt before came back.</p><p>"Great performance, as always, Rafael." He said, his accent throwing Sonny for a minute because it wasn't what he expected.</p><p>"You too," Rafael smiled, giving him a one-arm hug, still holding Sonny's hand, "I'd like you to meet someone," He said as he puled back, "Ramin this is Sonny, Sonny this is Ramin."</p><p>"Nice to meet you, Rafael has spoken a lot about you." Ramin said, holding his hand out which Sonny shook.</p><p>"He has?"</p><p>"Constantly."</p><p>"That's enough of that," Rafael was almost blushing, "See you tomorrow, yeah?"</p><p>"Of course, another night another show," He said, "Nice to meet you Sonny, don't be a stranger."</p><p>"Goodnight, Ramin." Rafael said, one hand on the door, pushing it open. Ramin laughed.</p><p>"Goodnight Rafael, Sonny." He nodded at them and then he left, Rafael pushed the door open and pulled Sonny inside.</p><p>"So... you talk about me?" Sonny asked, it was his turn to smirk.</p><p>"Shut up."</p><p>"And here I was, beginning to feel jealous because of the heart eyes you were throwing that guy on stage."</p><p>"Who?" Rafael turned to him, "Ramin? He's cute, but that's just the characters, Freddie and Anatoly are definitely fucking."</p><p>"Good to know."</p><p>"What are..." Sonny cut him off, grabbing Rafael by the front of that leather jacket and pushed him against the closest wall, kissing him in a way he's been dreaming of since One Night in Bangkok.</p><p>No. Since he's been dreaming of since he first laid eyes on Rafael Barba, ADA.</p><p>Rafael was surprised but kissed him back, sinking into Sonny as he grabbed at his arms, shoulders, hips, <em>anywhere</em> he could get purchase as Sonny pressed his thigh against his crotch, making him whimper, slowly rutting against it and this was everything Sonny ever dreamt of and more. That was, until, Rafael tried to remove his jacket.</p><p>"No, leave it on." Sonny said, pulling away from Rafe's mouth, both of them panting harshly.</p><p>"But it's hot, Sonny."</p><p>"Yeah, you are." Rafael groaned, but stopped trying to remove it. Instead he grabbed Sonny by his hair, threading his fingers through the strands and pulled, exposing Sonny's throat so he could bite at it. Sonny couldn't think straight, the tension on his hair, the teeth on this skin, the way that Rafe was rutting faster against his thigh and his breaths came out in warm puffs of air against his neck. It was too much but not enough.</p><p>Sonny grabbed Rafael's hips, pulling him away from the wall and pushing him towards a table instead that had papers and makeup on it. Rafael blindly swiped at the table, everything falling to the floor as Sonny helped to get him sat on top. Rafe instantly wrapping his legs around Sonny's waist, pulling tightly that Sonny nearly fell onto him, Rafael bit up his jaw and to his lips, pulling him into another kiss that was so filthy and not what Sonny was expecting at all; maybe he should have though, with how Rafael was acting during One Night in Bangkok.</p><p><em>"I love you."</em> Rafael muttered the words first, Sonny stopped kissing him and pulled away, making Rafe whine.</p><p>"What?"</p><p>"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that," He panted, eyes scared, "Let's just get back to kissing? Yeah?"</p><p>"No, you... what?"</p><p>"I love you," Rafael said it louder this time, "I love you Sonny and I'm sorry I never said it earlier, I'm sorry I left without telling you, I was scared... I'm still scared."</p><p>"Of what?"</p><p>"Losing you..." Sonny moved his hands to cup Rafael's face, "Having you say that you don't feel the same..."</p><p>"Rafe," Sonny kissed him again, softly for a second, "I love you too."</p><p>"Oh..." Rafael rested his forehead against Sonny's, "I wasn't really expecting that."</p><p>"I turned up to your show."</p><p>"Yeah... I know, I didn't know what to expect when I saw you sat there," Sonny gently stroked his thumbs against Rafae's beard, "It made me nervous but also so excited."</p><p>"I nearly walked out before it even started, I was nervous you'd be mad that I had shown up," Sonny admitted, "I could have called but I didn't."</p><p>"I could have called too, but I left without even saying goodbye, I didn't know what to say," Rafael said, "It was cowardly, I'm just you came tonight."</p><p>"Me too, maybe I'll come every night." Rafael laughed, it was soft and airy but <em>happy.</em></p><p>"I'd like that," Rafael kissed him again, "Sonny?"</p><p>"Yeah?"</p><p>"Go lock the door."</p><p>"Why?" Rafael thrust his hips forward in answer, Sonny understood instantly, "Okay." He kissed Rafael again, almost like he was scared that if he didn't he wouldn't be able to kiss him ever again. </p><p>He turned away, walking back towards the door and locked it with shaking hands, he couldn't really believe that he was going probably fuck Rafael in his dressing room, after weeks of not seeing each other and after this love confession that hopefully meant something, that they were going to move forward together. Sonny felt giddy, turning around once he turned the lock, his breathe got caught in his throat.</p><p>Rafael had taken off his black shirt but had put the jacket back on, the button of his jeans were undone. His body was flushed, his chest rising and falling and Sonny briefly wondered how long they'd have before someone came knocking because he wanted to get his mouth all over this man. </p><p>Those thoughts left his head when Rafael reached out towards him, a whispered plea on his lips, almost begging for Sonny. It stirred something up inside of him, he crossed the room quickly, stripping from his own jacket and shirt, throwing them to the side, until he reached Rafe where he grabbed his face and kissed him; he felt drunk, his head swimming as Rafael started unfastening their pants, this was so much better than he dreamed.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
They didn't go out for a drink that night like they had originally planned, instead they almost got caught by the cleaners and Rafael had smoothed talked their way out of an embarrassing situation. They cleaned up the mess they created as quickly as possible so they could leave and Rafael invited Sonny back to his apartment for a nightcap that turned into something way better than that.</p><p>Sonny was at the show again the next night, front row, right where Rafael could see him. He didn't feel scared this time, there wasn't a single moment where he felt like he shouldn't be there. Especially when he went to meet Rafael by the stage door again and Rafe pulled him through the crowd and kissed him in front of everyone, the happiness Sonny saw on him while Rafael performed on stage was directed at Sonny.</p><p>No, it was <em>caused</em> by Sonny and when Rafael took him home again, Sonny cooking them a late dinner before they settled onto Rafe's couch and watched TV, Sonny realised that Rafael made him just as happy, and that this was something he could get used to.</p><p> </p><p>Sonny always made it Rafael's opening shows after that, there was nowhere else he'd rather be.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>"it's hot, Sonny"</p><p>"yeah, you are" provided by rion, thanks bestie</p></blockquote></div></div>
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